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The grass is as green as you want it to be
My name is Nolwazi Mfingwana maybe Nolwazi Moepeng or even Nolwazi Mfingwana Moepeng, mother of 2, aunt, wife, sister.
This is all dependent on when you knew me, where I ‘am (work, church or at home) or what I ‘am to you. I’m defined by society as a mother of 2, married to a Tswana speaking man who is born of a Zulu speaking woman. I ‘am a born again Seventh Day Adventist Christian. I ‘am born of a Pondo man and Mfengu woman, hailing from the great Pondo Kingdom along the beautiful Wild Coast in a small town called Flagstaff, and the new government came and changed our demarcation and we now fall under Mbizana. If you choose to visit the Wild Coast you most probably will fly to the King uShaka International airport in Durban and drive through Port Shepstone, Margate, Port Edward and cross over the great uMtamvuna river just after that majestic bridge you step into the former Transkei.
The roads start to swirl and curve, the grass lays before you in its virgin state, the kids are playing by the road and you will most probably start seeing woman coming up a hill with water buckets on their heads, the cattle grazing in the field, colorful rondavels are what most of the village people call home but now you will see a mansion or two. It’s the only place where you will be greeted, and a greeting followed by a genuine “How are you today?” in my language this will probably go “Nivuka njani namhlanje?” this question is sincere and comes from a beautiful place. I thank my parents for allowing me to be part of this place.
Now that you have a snippet of where I come from let me continue to tell you more about myself. I will be 35 July 7th interesting times I know. Just before I got married this is probably between the ages of 26 & 28, I decided that I will retire at 35 I started telling anyone & everyone who could listen, obviously everyone thought I was crazy; Who does that? What does that even mean? Some even said “And do what with yourself”? It’s never been done and unheard of. Which was good because I now had to define that for myself. My definition went something like; “I will no longer have to work for anyone but will work for myself, manage my own time and spend more time with family probably get time to travel”.
I ‘am a renowned Feminist(by Linda “my husband”), my definition of Feminism is portrayed by my lifestyle I live it more than I talk about it, so you will hear him throwing in a disclaimer on my behalf every time we have a conversation with friends “guys please excuse my wife she’s a Feminist and I embrace her” I roll my eyes and continue talking. I have started a couple of initiatives in my life some left hanging some completed, but I’ve never labeled myself a failure rather someone who isn’t scared of taking chances, succeeding is then defined by the learnings that come out of every adventure. I ‘am a crazy dreamer, I dream of things that people deem insane but that’s what keeps me alive ADVENTURE one of my sisters has this status on her WhatsApp since 2016 “If you think Adventure is dangerous, try routine it is Lethal” this statement resonates with me.
There is one thing that I would like to close this talk on; I now love God more than anything, I used to fear God. Raised Christian, going to church, I got to a point where church was more a routine than a way of life, I think it lost all meaning but obviously I wasn’t aware of it and even if I was, I could never tell my mother that. But I remember in East London when I decided to go back to God and church I went back out of fear, what if really there is this big fire that the devil will toss us in??? I had horror thoughts. I took my bible and started going to church, praying more and trusting more. Today I can safely say I love the Lord, I love the relationship we have, I ‘am grateful for all He has done for me, things I’ve asked for and things I never even knew I needed. Today I don’t go to church or pray out of fear I do it because its my way of life and it makes me whole.
There is one thing I believe in and I always will, where I ‘am today be it work, community, church any place that I place my feet at or conversation that I have, I have to fulfill the great commission “Go ye therefore and make disciples of all nations”.
So, one is probably asking how is the title of this talk related to what she just shared? People probably look at me and say; you have a beautiful family, you’ve never been unemployed, and your career is flourishing by the way it took me more than 3 years to complete my degree and you lost both your parents, but you are forever happy.
But I say to you “The grass is as green as you want it to be” if you are willing to strip your old lawn to plant one that is suitable for your yard All Season/LM/Kikuyu lawn do so, if you are willing to pay more for your water bill do so, if you are willing to have a weekly Gardner to tend to your lawn do so, if you are willing to pluck out the weed and look out for termites to kill them please do so.
My life is not as interesting as I’ve just painted it but I ‘am happy with what I have, and I have had to pay the cost of what seems to be my GREEN LAWN.
My name is whatever you want to call me, but who I ‘am is my everyday experience and that is defined by no one but God.